I’m not ready to go inside

…a beautiful moment and a long day ahead

(Written on Wednesday and accidentally published on Thursday…watch for the domino effect tomorrow)

I have a half hour before my shift at the bookstore as I begin writing this. Normally I go inside. I love being in the bookstore surrounded by books, chatting with the people who love them and making magic.

Right now I’m sitting outside, watching tiny birds search for the crumbs leftover from the people who sit on this bench outside.

I’ve said hello to passersbys, had nice chats with the locals I see every day, and thought about the day ahead of me.

I’m exhausted. For good reasons. After work last night I went to the volunteer appreciation party for our local documentary festival. All I did was chat to another volunteer for an hour, eat some pizza (I’m not supposed to have cheese but I was so hungry) and then I went home and took my partner and eldest kiddo on a walk, and go for a drive to look at the full moon.

(Ok looking back, that’s a lot)

Fast forward. It’s the end of my work day. I still have to pick up some food for my eldest. Some supplies for my partner. Walk my dog. Eat dinner. Then head back out and volunteer until 9pm.

Oof.

It’s hard not to blame my past self for piling all this on.

When I first signed up for volunteer shifts I had capacity. But capacity is hard to predict.

💖💖💖💖💖🪿

(A bunch of hearts and a sassy goose)

Fast forward to now. 10:38pm

I did it.

I volunteered.

The documentary was not an easy one to watch. It was incredible. It was brilliant. It was mostly filmed by a 15 year old genocide survivor. It is called Mediha. I was greeter, usher, and handled mid duties for the Q&A then had to go home, make guacamole for my kiddo, and snuggle my pup.

💖💖💖

I can’t even write anymore.

I have wept. I am so exhausted. But the movie was so important.

Tomorrow…it’s a new day.

Heart,

Wake